Nekochan came into work yesterday asking me about Atlantic City. She asked me how it was, and instead of answering her query, I asked her one of my own. I asked her if she would like to compete with me. She raised her eyebrow and asked me what brought this about. I shrugged and said that it would be fun.
I never really wanted to compete. That wasn't ever one of my dreams. I believe that the first person that put that thought into my head was Snap. Snap, who wanted to go all out with the dancing experience, Snap who broke my heart. I would've done anything for her, including a complete turnaround on my mindset of just sharing the joys of learning how to dance. I said yes when she asked me if I wanted to go for it. She warned me though that she could be a total bitch and I said that I could handle it. She never believed me when I said that. Sadly, she never found my true potential before she severed our ties. Also, she introduced a seed that was slowly growing, unknown even to me.
After Snap, Ma Cherie saved me from the void; she brought light once more to the dungeon that I had put myself in. For the longest time, I was afraid to ask her anything, then she confessed a love for swing dancing. I thought that perhaps I've found my partner, and so I asked her. She mentioned that she wanted to learn how to tango and I told her that I was willing to teach her. I hesitantly asked her if she wanted to be my partner, and she said yes. I felt then, that nothing could ever possibly go wrong.
And then she got sick.
She passed away not too long after that. Once again, I found myself slowly sinking back into the darkness.
Of all the people that I didn't expect to fish me out of that murky existence, it would have to be Mi Fidanzata. She had no reason to, and yet she did. Now, whatever she asks of me, I may find myself agreeing to it. Most of the time anyway.
So I ask Nekochan to think about it, and she tells me that I'm being bad. She admits that she's lost the thrill and is contemplating leaving the studio. I look at her, with sadness in my eyes, and yet she doesn't see it.
Perhaps I am not fated to take this path, after all.
I never really wanted to compete. That wasn't ever one of my dreams. I believe that the first person that put that thought into my head was Snap. Snap, who wanted to go all out with the dancing experience, Snap who broke my heart. I would've done anything for her, including a complete turnaround on my mindset of just sharing the joys of learning how to dance. I said yes when she asked me if I wanted to go for it. She warned me though that she could be a total bitch and I said that I could handle it. She never believed me when I said that. Sadly, she never found my true potential before she severed our ties. Also, she introduced a seed that was slowly growing, unknown even to me.
After Snap, Ma Cherie saved me from the void; she brought light once more to the dungeon that I had put myself in. For the longest time, I was afraid to ask her anything, then she confessed a love for swing dancing. I thought that perhaps I've found my partner, and so I asked her. She mentioned that she wanted to learn how to tango and I told her that I was willing to teach her. I hesitantly asked her if she wanted to be my partner, and she said yes. I felt then, that nothing could ever possibly go wrong.
And then she got sick.
She passed away not too long after that. Once again, I found myself slowly sinking back into the darkness.
Of all the people that I didn't expect to fish me out of that murky existence, it would have to be Mi Fidanzata. She had no reason to, and yet she did. Now, whatever she asks of me, I may find myself agreeing to it. Most of the time anyway.
So I ask Nekochan to think about it, and she tells me that I'm being bad. She admits that she's lost the thrill and is contemplating leaving the studio. I look at her, with sadness in my eyes, and yet she doesn't see it.
Perhaps I am not fated to take this path, after all.
posted by Sascha at
12/07/2005 10:33:00 AM
1 Comments:
it is because of the first conversation that we ever had: you seemed uncomfortable with the idea of talking to somebody once associated to your sibling, even if it were just in passing.
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